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Some bits of life.

Trigger warnings galore-read at your own risk.

The scale in the ladies locker room at my gym is broken. :(

Either that or I lost 20 pounds in a week, which seems unlikely, much as I would like it to be true. I used an electronic one, which said I’d gained 2 1/2, but that doesn’t feel right either, and who knows what that one was originally calibrated at.

This could just be the universe’s way of telling me to stay off the bloody scale and just keep trying on the “skinny" jeans until something fits. Right now the “fat pants" are getting increasingly tent-like, but the next size down (which were more or less comfortable when I went to London two years ago) feel about a million miles away.

I’m putting in a LOT of bike miles, doing weights on alternate days and having tofu as my dinner protein more than any human should have to.

I’m afraid if I stop weighing, I’ll slip back into the denial that got me here——here being close to 200. But I also know that bowing down to the evil scale god is a form of insanity in itself.

I’ve gotten the Credit Card Bill that I had managed to run up to nearly $2000.00, down to $316.20.

Right after Hubby had the 2nd (I think) motorcycle accident, I opened a GAP Visa account to get him some new jeans....and this was KNOWING that I have a very complicated relationship with money, especially credit cards...and it's not that different from my relationship with food---let's say credit card=sugar, as in if I take one bite, there is no stopping me.

I had to switch the balance from the GAP card to a No Interest Citi-bank card, and practice a level of credit card restraint that is still somewhat alien to me, but it’s a good feeling.


( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
Jul. 28th, 2013 04:13 am (UTC)
Yeah, the Scale God can be very troubling. Hard to find a balance where it's motivating without becoming an obsession.

Congratulations on getting so much paid on the credit card!
Jul. 30th, 2013 08:51 pm (UTC)
The card is a real relief, but so analogous to the food and weight. As I get older the chances to get the weight off are diminishing as are the opportunities to pay down debt.
Jul. 28th, 2013 12:56 pm (UTC)
You need some "in-between" pants, hon :) (And if you had lost 20 pounds in a week, you'd be in the emergency room. I think Hubby would have noticed.)

But your health has to be getting better regardless of the pounds. And YAY for debt reduction!
Jul. 30th, 2013 08:50 pm (UTC)
It's just frustrating. I know the Evil Scale God IS Evil, but I need to have it at least be consistent in it's evilness.

Hubby noticing is dubious, as he CLAIMS not to have noticed the gain. I'm currently trying to figure out exactly WHERE the fat is. I know a lot is in the gut, and that a nightmare because the first place you put it on is the last place you lose it....but it's NOT all there. So now I'm getting highly concerned about the state of my arse.
Jul. 31st, 2013 06:28 am (UTC)
Yes! Always good to know your enemy.

It's not entirely a bad thing to keep an eye on your weight. But once a week is plenty, thanks. I don't weigh myself very often, but the doctor does (I see him every few months or so) and at least that is consistent.

I HATE gut fat. I'm susceptible enough to heartburn as it is, dammit. At least arse fat can help protect your tailbone when you fall on it. (Which is useful when you pick up the cat and forget how heavy she is. OUCH.)
Aug. 2nd, 2013 12:08 am (UTC)
Hmm. Gut fat helps you . . . sit up without feeling like you're always falling backwards?

Last time I took a bathroom scale seriously I was actually weighing the cat (by subtraction.) Seventeen pound fuzzball. Her mom called her fa-Toni -- spelled "fatone" and pronounced like a character from the Sopranos.
Aug. 2nd, 2013 10:33 pm (UTC)
I was able to get into the "skinnier" jeans, in terms of standing up and being able to button and zip. But not really sit comfortably or spend much time in them.
Aug. 3rd, 2013 07:49 am (UTC)
Have you ever tried jeans with a little spandex in the fabric? I found some at Goodwill that were cotton and something like 3% spandex. First time I've been comfortable in jeans in about twenty years.
Aug. 3rd, 2013 02:58 pm (UTC)
At this point, I won't go NEAR jeans that aren't a bit stretchy. The ones I'm trying now are the jeans and pants I've owned for years, mostly my Gloria Vanderbilts in 12 and 14 which do tend to have some spandex or are so beat up that their way looser than originally intended anyway.

It's just a matter of getting down to where I was about two years ago.
Aug. 5th, 2013 05:42 am (UTC)
I remember being a size 14 once. *sigh*

I'm sure you'll get back to your preferred weight. Just don't forget to have fun along the way!
Aug. 3rd, 2013 07:52 am (UTC)
I'd think the opposite. Gut MUSCLE -- well, really, ab muscle -- helps me sit up, period. (And I've had lousy abs all my life.)

Seventeen pounds?! For Fatone's sake, I hope she was a Maine Coon!
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )



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