karaokegal (karaokegal) wrote,

K-Gal's Marriage Meme-Countdown to 20th Anniversary

Our first question comes from topaz_eyes, who wants to know, what is it like, having been married for 20 years.

The #1 thing I would say is that it's comfortable. For all the craziness, we've put each other through, and the shit that continues to happen (I'll spare you a recap of the injuries and hospitalizations) there's just a sense of being safe and secure that the other one will always be there, and all will be forgiven, if necessary.

I think the one thing that marks us as long term couple is the shared (if faltering) institutional memory. We have a history together. We have stories. We have the movies seen, the trips taken, the in-jokes, the tragedies, etc. They're all things we experienced together and when people talk about "ties that bind" I think that's one of the main things.

One reason I can't imagine being in a relationship with anyone else or having to start over, is how could I be with someone who hasn't been through all those things with me?

I fully understand that life is suffering and everything I love will be taken from me. (Living with a neophyte Buddhist is so much fun.) However, I also cling to the illusion that none of that is true and that we will be "together forever" simply because I feel like we already have.
Tags: anniversary, anniversary countdown, hubby, journal, meme

  • Post a new comment


    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded