karaokegal (karaokegal) wrote,
karaokegal
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A pissy, rambling, tin-hatty, White Collar rant

Warning-includes spoilers for season to date.

Last night I re-watched Taking Account, then watched As You Were (which I hadn't seen yet) and On The Fence. And I ended up super-duper pissed off. I thought this was a "non-invested" show for me, but right now I want to rage a bit. The thing is, I'm not sure who I'm pissed off AT.




The obvious "target" is Neal Caffrey. A BIG, HEARTY FUCK YOU TO NEAL CAFFREY! Not telling Mozzie about the manifest was 100% not acceptable. What the fuckety, fucking fuck was he thinking. Known how well he knows Mozzie and how antsy Mozzie is to get the hell of out of dodge WITH NEAL, what made him think that Mozzie wouldn't sell one of the pieces on his own. It's almost like he wants Mozzie to make that error, both so that Neal doesn't have to make a decision and so that he can then pull the moral high-ground which really makes me want to smack him. HARD.

I disliked the Neal/Sara in Taking Account. Actually, I just don't buy Neal/Sara. Not even as Neal using her for whatever reason (either a beard for his criminal activity or the other kind). I just never, ever bought the big love between. Not because I'm Sara-hater (although I suspect who-ever designs her costumes is) or between I'm Peter/Neal slasher who doesn't want any icky het threatening my slash ship. I never felt she was a real threat to Neal/Mozzie, because I think that's already "broken" and it's Mozzie trying to hold on for dear life that I find so poignant.

There's just nothing there chemistry-wise. Again, this has nothing to with shipping. I do think Matt Bomer has chemistry with some of the actresses on the show. I felt some heat with Alex and heck, even with June. (I know this is sacrilege on so many levels, but Neal and Diana in Need to Know were hotter than any of Neal's faux wall-banger sex with Sara) Not with Sara and most certainly NOT with Faith Raquel.

Note to Jeff Eastin et al: It's a little late in the day for Eliza Dushku to still be playing a Faith-like character, right down to the accent. You're a pretty good writer Jeff, but you are NO Joss Wheedon. Seriously, that was hideous.

Speaking of accents: Wiki tells me that Ross McCall is a Scottish actor, but either that was supposed to be a bad Cockney to show that Sara was an idiot or my ear for British regionalism isn't as good as I like to fancy it. He sounded atrociously fake to me.

Speaking of Keller---and slashing Neal, in general. I'm certainly not one of those folks who immediately equates rumored (or confirmed) gay male with slash-only pairings. And there are some het pairings where I do see plausibility and chemistry, however Bomer and/or Neal tends to ping my slash-glasses with almost every male interaction.

On one hand, yes that includes Peter. Obviously that's what's being sold. BUT as most of you know, I HATE "SPOON-FED SLASH." Eastin needs to get the fuck off Twitter. He needs to stop baiting the slash-fans, especially when we're obviously NOT going to get to canon Neal/Peter or Neal/Peter/El no matter how much he teases it. So fanservice all you want, but just STFU about it.

But here's the thing. For all of the fanservice and bait and switching that's being done deliberately on the Neal/Peter front, how can a sane person read the Neal/Mozzie dynamic as anything but past lovers with one trying to hold on. Did you see those expressions in the big confrontation? Did you hear the tone of voice? Was Willie Garson playing ANYTHING but love and betrayal there?

And I honestly don't know if it's being written that way or I am just a big ol tin-hatter, but man...it came across loud and clear that every single bit of Neal/Mozzie back-story fanon I've ever fanoned was being validated right there.

I also continue to ship Neal/Keller hate!sex and Neal/Adler fucked up power dynamic sex. I was even seeing potential in the Neal/Jones scene.


So I'm livid at Neal for treating Mozzie like shit, even though I know that Neal is a fictional character and the man I need to be raging at is Jeff Eastin, for making Neal act like a prick and handing him the idiot ball at the same time. Unless as I theorize above, Neal is deliberately setting up Mozzie, what was the freaking point of holding out on him? What am I missing here people?

Speaking of stupid plot points: why would Peter put that picture in the safe with manifest. Is he expecting Neal to break in or not. If he is, why not bust him then and there. Is he that convinced of Neal's emotional attachment to Peter and the team that he really thinks the picture would keep him from leaving? If he does think that, isn't he being a bastard as well? Am I supposed to like him for that? (I generally do like it when Peter gets to not be an idiot, but emotionally manipulating Neal doesn't sit well with me either.)

Eastin better have something spectacular up his sleeve for next week or I'm going to spend the hiatus writing some very angry drabbles.
Tags: fandom, mozzie, neal caffrey, neal/adler, neal/mozzie, peter burke, ranting, white collar
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