karaokegal (karaokegal) wrote,

Question Meme Time-Day 2

I got ten questions from filthgoblin. If you want questions, leave a comment.

Instead of a giant wall of text, I'll do the answers one day at time.

Question 2-Do you have any regrets in your life? If so, what are they? If not, why not?

Sometimes I feel I am nothing but regrets. Stupid things I said or did that I can't forget are a big one, or just ways I let people down, mostly through my own malaise and selfishness.

The biggest concrete one, with a long-term effect on my life is blowing off my education. I've always been good at writing/reading and crap at math/science. So I coasted on what I was good at and didn't push myself at the stuff that didn't come easy. I was the ultimate "doesn't live up to her potential" child in high school.

By the time I got to college I was barely trying. I gave up on math after getting through remedial algebra but being bored to death by statistics. The last few years, I was mostly going to college just to keep getting financial aid, which was helping to keep my family afloat. I pretty much ignored my pre-req courses and did well at a bunch of electives that interested me.

I gave up the charade after a semester where I basically stayed up all night, drove to Montclair State College in the morning and slept in the parking lot all day. The hardest part was admitting to my grandmother that I was quitting college. I know she was very disappointed. At the time I was just relieved, but looking back, I really wish I was the kind of person who could have made myself work harder and actually give a damn.
Tags: meme, questions

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