Characters: Jack Bristow (Includes references to Sydney Bristow, Danny Hecht, Anna Espinosa)
Rating: PG13 (But it's really a lot worse than that.)
WARNINGS: If you are remotely squick-able to incest, under-age, dub-con, involuntary exhibitionism or a father being super-creepy, please don't read this. No matter who you are-READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. If you get triggered, it's not my fault.
Notes: Written for MMOM 2012, Day 30. Welcome to that part of the Merry Month where I totally lose and start crossing lines like you would not believe. Unbeta'd because I'm afraid to show it to anybody. Comments and concrit welcome, but please read the warnings first.
Summary: Jack recalls his part in making Sydney the agent she is. Takes place immediately after Danny's phone call to Jack in Truth Be Told.
Jack put down the phone after his deliberately rude telling-off of Danny Hecht. Not that it would do any good. Danny was clearly in love with Sydney; a few snide remarks from her mean old man wasn’t going to scare him off. If anything it would only make him more protective.
He could hardly blame Danny for loving Syd. That was Syd’s calling, both by training and her natural gifts. It was virtually impossible not to love her. Danny Hecht would be a very lucky man. Jack only wished he didn’t know how lucky. Too late. The memories were coming back full force and it would take more liquor than he could justify at this hour to fend them off.
Jack had managed to rationalize everything he did to Sydney. Well, almost everything.
Project Christmas was meant to produce an effective agent who could handle every possible challenge that might come up on a mission. Neither the CIA nor the KGB had ever been shy about using the sexuality of their officers to achieve their goals.
For the boys, it was usually just a matter of teaching them to direct their hormones toward the good of the organization. Females were another matter. Before their charms could be harnessed they had to be unleashed. That required a special course of preliminary orientation. Grooming, he supposed they’d call it now, when he allowed himself to remember at all.
There was a room in the house that had been Laura’s study, back when there was still a Laura. When Sydney was … fourteen or fifteen, oh go ahead, Jack, be honest with yourself for a change, when she was twelve and a half, Jack had made it very clear that Sydney was never to go in there and then laid an elaborate puzzle for her to find the keys. Sydney lived up to her IQ quite easily and was investigating the contents of the room within a week.
Books. Magazines. Toys. Things that no child should know about or see, but even then Sydney was no mere child. At first she merely examined the items, looked over the pictures, glanced at the prose and walked away, her face a mixture of confusion and disdain. Jack had breathed a sigh of relief as he watched on the monitors. Too young, he’d thought then, much too young, even though the training had to start early. He’d seen Irina’s files. He knew exactly when she’d first been…instructed.
By the time she was thirteen, Sydney was going into the room on a regular basis. The first time she actually touched herself while looking at a picture of two women clad in leather, there was still a sense of wonderment at the feelings she could generate with her hands on her own body. There was something almost sweet about it, but it wasn’t just sweetness that she would need.
To do the job she was born for, Sydney would need to be able to convincingly play at any scenario, involving men and women in virtually any number or combination. Jack installed a VCR and a combination safe filled with graphic footage, some of it so extreme that the most liberal judge in Massachusetts would be screaming for an injunction if they got a peek at a single frame.
That did the trick and also proved Syd’s burgeoning ability at safe-cracking, which he suspected would come in handy as well.
Jack had chosen not to know the details of which young men Sydney was involved with in college, but he knew there were such young men. What he did know, was exactly what SD6 was requiring of their top operative and how successfully she was completing those missions. Often she could bring in the desired intel through stealth or charm or even superior fighting skills, but not always. He’d made sure she had the skills and wasn’t afraid to use them. Perhaps she even enjoyed that part of the assignment; especially when the fetching Ms. Espinosa was involved. Jack couldn’t help noticing the resemblance between Anna and one of the women who’d first stimulated his daughter’s sensual impulses.
Yes, Danny Hecht would be a lucky man, if he managed to stay alive. Jack would do everything he could to protect Danny, but he honestly didn’t think it would be enough. Sydney falling in love wasn’t something he had a contingency plan for. Very short-sighted now that he thought about it. He knew he’d been distracted by his own feelings; mostly the guilt.
He could justify the training. He could even rationalize that it had been necessary for him to do the observing. There was only one thing he couldn’t forgive himself for; one thing he prayed Syd would never find out about.
What he'd done while he was watching.