A supernatural glitch in your DVR occurs. At first you panic, hitting lots of random buttons on your remote control, but then are RELIEVED to discover that no, your entire series recording of Golden Girls has not been deleted! But then, just as things appear to be back to normal, there's a puff of smoke, and a fairy appears! You have apparently freed the TV fairy from a televised hell in which she was made to watch endless reruns of Are You Hot?, and as fairies tend to be when freed, she is very grateful and wants to grant you magic wishes.
Now, the fairy has only TV-related powerz, and so she offers you the chance to go back in time and retroactively CHANGE the history of your favorite TV shows with 3.5 wishes!
1. You can go back in time and erase from the fabric of TV history THREE individual episodes of any TV show you want! What do you choose?
House MD-"One Day, One Room" is the most obvious one. Unfortunately there's no way to obliterate the whole Tritter arc in only three eps, but I'd be sorely tempted to remove both "Whac-A-Mole" and "Finding Judas." Alternatively I'd take out two of the "Survivor" episodes, specifically "Whatever It Takes" and "Ugly," because the sight of House supposedly being "stupid" because of CIA chick is something I can easily go the rest of my life without thinking about ever again.
2. You can go back in time and revive ONE unfairly cancelled television show and return it to the annals of TV history!* *CHOOSE WISELY, because if you attempt to revive more than one show, the wish will backfire and you'll instead be treated to a whole bunch of crappy made-for-TV "reunion" movies full of replacement actors.
Gotta go with Black Sheep Squadron. (Hi, vanillafluffy) Robert Conrad at his hottest (aside from Wild, Wild West), a bunch of young actors all on the verge of going on to great and not-so-great things. The awesome work of Red West as Andy Micklin. Slash potential everywhere you look. I remember being absolutely gutted (before I even knew the expression) when this was canceled. I went to Universal Studios as part of a Teen Tour and bugged people to tell me it hadn't been canceled and they all lied to me. BASTARDS. This would also have saved us from the batch of lack-luster and short-lived shows that Mr. Conrad did in the few years afterwards.
To balance out the historical TV viewing schedule, you now have the power to retroactively CANCEL, at any point during the series, any one show! Alternately, you can wield your destructive might and DELETE one whole entire series from ever having been made.
I know it's brought pleasure to many people on my F-list, but it would still be my fondest wish for Supernatural never to have existed and all that fannish creativity and talent to be brought to bear on something the very mention of which does not causes severe nausea.
3. LIFE AND DEATH! You can now bring ONE character back from the dead... and, to restore the balance, you must also kill off a character! They don't have to be from the same fandom.
LIFE-Deadwood-Wild Bill Hickock. I know he had to die historically, but there was also more story to tell with him and Jane, Seth, Al, etc. Keith Carradine is an awesome actor and I would give anything to have had Bill around for just one more season.
DEATH-Tricky. Tricky. I know what you're thinking, but Mr. Whineybutt survives another day. Good-bye Detective Tritter. You meet your deserved end in a dark alley and never show up at PPTH to wreak havoc on House MD
3.5 Bonus tradeoff: you can delete a single scene, relationship pairing or plot arc from any series that gave you hives... AND you can plug in any one [scene, pairing, plot arc] that you never got to see!
TORCHWOOD-NO GREENHOUSE SCENE FROM ADRIFT!!!!
Plug in a scene where Jack is very clearly flirting or lusting after anyone or anything else, or a throwaway line along the lines of the "alien meat" or "cruising with Isherwood" that mentions a woman. Anything that gives evidence that Torchwood acknowledges Jack's omni-sexuality and puts the lie to Jack/Ianto as anything but "dabbling," (at least on Jack's part.)