From last week's episode: House/Plumber fic. They got all the screen time that should have been House/Wilson. Apparently the plumber gave House the epiphany to solve the case. He's proven to be House's kind of guy by accepting and rather hefty bribe and it looks like someone's going to have to come back and deal with those loose "pipes." You even have my permission to use the obvious, possible ribald smushname. Extra points if the weird night janitor gets jealous.
Bunnies for this week inspired by comment from tourmaline1973.
Cuddy needs a friend, and not just Wilson, who is a lousy friend since he can't keep his mouth shut. Recurring theme actually. He told Amber about the STD scam and he told Cameron about the "cancer." So it's not actually a sign of his House-love, it's a problem. (Bonus bunny-fic about WHY Wilson is like this. Assume it ties in to need to be liked. Was he big gossip in High School?) Anyway, pretty much the only friend we've ever seen Cuddy have is STACY!
Let Stacy come back to help with baby, and get in House's face, which could then trigger Wilson's jealous instincts. Stacy-baby humour and House/Stacy/Wilson angst ensue.
Remember incredibly awkward conversation during Wilson/Cuddy date scene in Forever, when Wilson failed the Daddy test? Implication was that he wasn't interested in kids. Yet here he is all over Cuddy and Cuddy baby. Why? Was it him or Julie? Does he know he's got fertility issues? Is there craziness with Mom and Dad Wilson, such as the kind that drove Brother Wilson to the streets? Can I get some internal Wilson angst tying the two things together?
Inspired by comment from starhawk2005
What if Cuddy gives one more person a shot at "baby-sitting" House and it's Chase! Does House use the sexual innuendo routine or does he go into anti-authority figure mode as in Vogler, Tritter, Dad. If he does the sexual innuendo thing, does Chase deflect or go for it? Extra points for House/Chase smut, and double fudge brownie points for Wilson jealousy.
I know I could do something with all of these, but I do not have the time. And of course if the crack monkeys were doing their jobs instead of assuming I give a damn about Thirteen and her Huntingtons, I wouldn't have to worry about it because they'd be dealing with all of this while having House treat patients with cases I care about as well.